Cold Turkey

In reality, there aren't many things that piss me off more that an idiot waking me up on the 5 am train. (there are Cubs fans, but that is a totally different story) My theory is that it is 5 o'clock in the morning, even if you aren't going to sleep, sit down and STFU so that the other 90% of us can sleep. You would be shocked to learn how many people can't even handle that bit of basic courtesy.

Lately there has been a guy who has taken to sitting in the backseats of my car, either next to me, or across the aisle from me. This guy has to be a crack addict going through an AM withdrawl. He cannot sit still to save his life, he is constantly shifting, twitching, and moving around. He is on the cell-phone, on the blackberry, and just generally yelling at the poor people who work for him. He also likes to read the newspaper, rustling it as loud as humanly possible with every turn of the page. I have no idea if the guy is ADHD, or what, but he needs to be strapped down like they do to people in the ER with spinal injuries. Hopefully the guy goes back to sitting whereever he came from before, or moves up another car and sits with the gorditas.